On 'Becoming A Man'

Remembering Paul Monette

PAUL MONETTE = CHAMPION OF HIS PEOPLE

Today marks the birthday of the late, great author and poet Paul Monette, a writer whose words still burn with truth, tenderness, and fury.

I first discovered his award-winning memoir, Becoming A Man: Half A Life Story, while I was coming out in the early 1990s. The book felt like both a confession and a call to arms, a beautifully written account of one man’s fight to discover himself in a world that demanded he stay hidden.

To say Paul Monette’s story and storytelling moved me deeply would be an understatement.

What struck me most then, and still does now, is the way Monette wrote with equal parts love and rage. Love for the men he loved. Rage for the years stolen by shame and silence.

Monette knew that by telling his story, he might help others live theirs more freely.

All these years later, Becoming A Man remains one of those rare books that feels alive. Urgent, human, and heartbreakingly honest. It reminds me that all our stories matter. That even in the face of loss and grief and fear, we can choose to live as fully and truthfully as possible.

Today, on his 80th birthday, I remember and pay tribute to Paul Monette. I light candles to honor his courage and his craft, his love and his rage.

Thank you, Paul, for shining your light and helping so many find their own.

Keep calm and remember on…
Clint 🌈✌️

PAUL MONETTE = “REMEMBER, LOVE WILL SEE US THROUGH.”

P.S. A few months ago, I was honored when a dear subscriber—hi, Victor!—reached out to share his memories of Paul Monette and his circle of friends and lovers. Paul and Victor were close friends until Paul’s bitter(sweet) end. I’m so grateful to have heard a few of their shared stories.

P.P.S. LGBTQ history rarely makes it into textbooks, so I think it’s up to us to document as much as we can…for ourselves and for the next generations.

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FYC = FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

• The Art Of Writing It Down (Max Pete)

• Interview w/ Ballroom Icon Milton Garcia Ninja! (Legends of Vogue)

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ON THIS DAY = OCTOBER 16

BIRTHDAYS

• 1758 = Noah Webster = American lexicographer

• 1854 = Oscar Wilde = Irish poet and playwright 🌈

• 1884 = Rembrandt Bugatti = Italian sculptor

• 1888 = Eugene O’Neill = American playwright and Nobel Prize laureate

• 1890 = Paul Strand = American photographer and director

• 1903 = Big Joe Williams = American singer-songwriter

• 1925 = Angela Lansbury = English-American actor, singer, and producer

• 1926 = Charles Dolan = American businessman and HBO founder

• 1928 = Mary Daly = American philosopher and theologian 🌈

• 1938 = Nico = German singer-songwriter, model, and actor

• 1940 = Barry Corbin = American actor and producer

• 1945 = Paul Monette = American author, poet, and activist 🌈

• 1946 = Suzanne Somers, American actor and producer

• 1947 = Bob Weir, American singer-songwriter

• 1947 = David Zucker, American filmmaker

• 1948 = André Leon Talley = American stylist and creative director 🌈

• 1958 = Tim Robbins, American actor, director, and screenwriter

• 1960 = Cressida Dick = British police commissioner 🌈

• 1961 = Scott O’Hara = American porn performer, writer, editor, and publisher 🌈

• 1962 = Flea = Australian-American bass player, songwriter, and actor

• 1969 = Wendy Wilson = American singer-songwriter

• 1971 = Paul Sparks = American actor

• 1977 = John Mayer = American singer-songwriter

• 1975 = Kellie Martin = American actor, director, and producer

• 1980 = Jeremy Jackson = American actor and singer

• 1980 = Sue Bird = American professional basketball player 🌈

• 1983 = Andrew Santino = American stand-up comedian and actor

EVENTS

• 1912 = Arnold Schoenberg‘s Pierrot Lunaire, sung by Albertine Zehme, premieres at the Berlin Choralion-Saal.

• 1916 = Margaret Sanger opens the first family planning clinic in the United States.

• 1923 = Walt Disney and his brother, Roy, found the Disney Brothers Cartoon Studio, today known as The Walt Disney Company.

• 1950 = The first novel of the The Chronicles of Narnia series by C. S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, was published in the UK.

• 2002 = The Bibliotheca Alexandrina opens in Egypt, commemorating the ancient library of Alexandria.

HOLIDAYS + OBSERVANCES

• LGBTQ History Month (October 1-31) 🌈🧐📚

• National Dictionary Day

• National Liqueur Day

• National Sports Day

• Spirit Day 💜💜💜

• World Food Day

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PORTRAIT + QUOTE OF THE DAY

OSCAR WILDE PORTRAIT RE-AIMAGINED

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.”
Oscar Wilde