Buyer Beware

A Cautionary Tale Of Getting Scammed

Photo by sarah b on Unsplash

Yesterday morning, before the sun even rose, I scheduled and paid for a massage with a local but new-to-me masseur. My regular guy is booked solid for a while, so I figured it was time to find a backup.

“Frank” and I connected through SCRUFF, the hookup app that lives in that blurry, crowded space between business and pleasure, where flirting, networking, fantasy, and convenience all overlap and no one is ever quite sure what anyone else is really there for. It’s part dating app, part marketplace, part digital cruising ground, open 24/7 for whatever you happen to be in the mood for.

I was half asleep. My guard was down. My body was sore.

In other words, I was the perfect customer. I mean, mark.

The profile looked legit. Friendly. Professional enough. The conversation felt normal. We talked about what I was looking for, availability, location, and pricing. He shared his “menu” of services and even sent a photo of his studio.

Nothing felt off. Not at first, anyway.

He was a bit too pretty for my tastes, but there are lots of “too pretty” guys in the LA area. No real red flags. No obvious weirdness. Just a guy offering a service and me very much needing that service.

Then he asked for payment up front to “secure the appointment.”

That should have been my first pause.

But I’ve paid deposits before. I’ve booked massages online before. I’ve met some genuinely great people through Scruff without incident. I’ve lived in the modern world long enough that prepaying for services doesn’t feel inherently sketchy anymore.

So I sent $120 to a strange email address and waited for the details.

That’s when things started to unravel.

WHO TF IS “JIMMY POZ COOPER”?

It took some poking and prodding just to get an address. And that’s when my internal bullshit detector finally kicked in. Maybe it was just waking up too….

Long story short, “Frank” scammed me. Soon my relaxing Sunday morning turned into a lesson in digital mistrust and misplaced optimism.

Here’s the part that stings the most: it wasn’t just the money. Of course, losing $120 is annoying, especially as a freelancer. But the real loss was the feeling of being played. Of being naive. Of realizing that someone deliberately crafted a small, believable story to extract a little bit of cash from a stranger who just wanted a massage.

I’m mostly mad at myself. I know better. I’m not new to the internet. But scams don’t rely on stupidity. They rely on timing, mood, trust, and just enough plausibility to slip past your internal alarm system.

They catch you when you’re tired. Or lonely. Or sore. Or horny. Or busy. Or hopeful.

Yesterday, I was tired and sore and hopeful.

So please consider this a friendly, cautionary tale:

If someone you’ve never met wants full payment in advance for a service arranged through a dating or hookup app, slow down. Verify. Ask for a website. A business page. Reviews. Real-world proof that the person exists outside of an app profile.

And if your gut whispers, even slightly, “This feels off,” listen to it. And run.

That quiet inner voice is usually the only part of you that isn’t being distracted by hope, desire, or the promise of something easy and comforting. Especially when everything looks fine on the surface. That’s often when it’s easiest to ignore.

I didn’t get a massage yesterday. But I did get a wakeup call.

A reminder that trust should be earned, not rushed. That convenience can make us careless. That when we’re tired, tender, or just craving a little relief, we’re more likely to outsource our judgment along with our money.

Trust is valuable. Convenience is seductive. And sometimes the most expensive thing you pay for isn’t the service you hoped for, but the clarity you didn’t realize you needed. The kind that shows up disguised as a small loss and leaves you a little wiser, a little more cautious, and a lot more weary of strangers on the internet.

Keep calm and move on!
Clint 🌈✌️

P.S. Thanks to my roommate, I now know the photos were of actor Stephen Jack. Turns out reverse image searches are your friends. As for “Frank,” I reported him to both SCRUFF and PayPal. May Lady Karma kick his ass sooner than later….

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FROM THE ARCHIVE

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BORN THIS WAY ON THIS DAY

• 02-16 = John Schlesinger (1926-2003) = English actor and director 🌈

• 02-16 = Katharine Cornell (1893-1974) = American actor, writer, and producer 🌈

• 02-16 = John Tartaglia (1978- ) = American actor, singer, and puppeteer 🌈

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MAN CRUSH(ES) OF THE DAY

JOHN SCHLESINGER

“I’ve never felt that using something with tongue in cheek has been a bad thing.”
John Schlesinger